Random Randoms

Random #1 Okay first, I have been very OCD lately when it comes to thinking I have forgotten something or forgotten to do something before I leave someplace. I cannot count the number of times over the last several months when I have arrived at the end of my block as I drive to work and been unsure if I actually closed the garage door, leading me to turn my car around, drive back down the street and make sure it's closed. It has never once been left open.

Or, I will get a few miles away and start thinking, "did I unplug the iron, did I close the doors to the bedroom," or, "did I grab my wallet/phone/books/computer/etc," until I realize, "oh yeah, there it is in the car." Part of the problem is, I do lose or forget stuff on a regular basis.

Like, I left my pants and shirt at our adoption agency last night because I changed into shorts before class and put my folded clothes on a chair. I didn't realize I had forgotten until Beth and I were halfway home.

Random #2 I bought a new car!! I bought a 2005 Prius Hybrid from a woman who is leaving for a year with her husband to travel the world and therefore needed to sell her car. Beth and I really clicked with her when we went to look at the car, which helped us in our purchasing decision. In a way, we felt like we were helping fund her world travels!

Anyway, it is salsa red with tinted windows and in very good shape. In the two days I have driven it I have averaged 50 MPG! WOW! And best of all, because of an Arizona State Law encouraging the use of fuel-efficient modes of transportation, I get a special license plate which allows me to drive in the carpool/HOV lane (HOV - High Occupancy Vehicle) with just me in the car! Ahhh, driving in the car pool lane will shave so much time and stress from my daily commute - it makes me do a very happy dance! =)

I'll post pictures this weekend.

Random #3 Beth and I are excited to be going dancing tonight with friends. There is a DJ who plays at Burning Man whose national tour brings him to the Phoenix area. So, we are going to go get our groove on tonight.

I am really looking forward to Burning Man. Basically, I will be dancing for about four and half days straight! Woo hoo! Thinking about it makes me happy and excited and nervous all in one. Our friend Greg, who is a marathon runner, said he danced so much at Burning Man last year that he had to stop because his legs were so worn out!

Random #4 I have been thinking it would be interesting to write a book about an alternate reality of what the world today could look like if we had not twice elected Bush as president. I worry his administration wants to start a major middle eastern war. Sigh...it depresses me. I wish I could disconnect, it just seems so damn important!

Random # 6 Here are several cool websites I have been browsing:

• AMF MusicLife - A friend of mine is posting links for music downloads of his favorite pop-music hits along with occasional surveys about pop music.
• Good News Network - This is a great site which features good news stories - simple as that. Nonpartisan and areligous, although it does have a "Religion" section. In addition, I have found links on here to other cool sites which feature more good news!
• TLLT Things Look Like Things - it is photography of things that look like other things. I just thought there were some really creative pictures.
• Iran Graffiti and Urban Art Report - I think the title is pretty self-explanatory.
• Word Imperfect - The blogger posts obscure dictionary words and asks others to submit creative, made-up definitions for the words. Readers are invited to vote on the best made-up definition for the previous days word. It's lots of fun - either to participate or just to read.

Random #7, A Hodge Podge:

• Beth and I are two classes away from completing our 33 hours of adoption training. Then, the agency has to finish our home study, we have to install our pool fence and "tot-locks" and I have to take CPR all before the case-worker can submit our application to the state for certification - phew! In the meantime, there has been no official change in Omar's status - although his attorney told us, through the foster-mom, to not give up hope, because she believes terminating his parent's rights is still best for Omar.
• I have had some great donor meetings over the last couple of weeks. I am getting to meet and interact with some amazing community leaders! And, I have done a nice job of "moving" the calls and securing commitments for more money to United Way's community-fund (our goal is to get donors to give money to our community fund vs. designating their United Way contribution to a single specific health and human service agency - about 60% of our donations go to our community fund, which is invested by volunteers into programs based on results and the remaining 40% are directed by the giver to specific agencies of their choice. Not that giving to a specific agency is bad, we just think our volunteer process has advantages.)
• I realized the other day, as I was giving myself some kudos, then beating myself up for giving myself kudos, that I have something inside me which often says, "if you (meaning I) say things are going well in your (meaning my) life, then by saying things are going well, you (I) are actually "jinxing" yourself (myself, okay you get the point) and that by approving or praising yourself or celebrating good things, you actually are tempting bad things to come into your life!" What an odd, unproductive thing to think! I have no idea where or why that script got lodged in my brain, but there it is!
• On that note, my summer class is going well. =)
• I am nervous about father's day. My dad and I haven't talked in a while and I always get nervous to call him, and my step-dad, so I usually avoid calling them, which offends them and makes me feel guilty. It makes me uncomfortable for a lot of reasons, which I won't lay out here, but I am going to call them each this year!

Random #8 Sometimes, there is so much going on in life and inside my head, and I want to "figure it all out", figure out what it means, to ensure I am "doing a good job" and "living a good life" and most times I can't figure it out and don't know the answers. But the last couple of weeks (even before I bought the car), I have felt a little lighter in my heart (even while at times being physically a little worn out) and I like that. During that time I have also struggled with envy, anger, frustration, fatigue and sadness. And that is just what life is about I guess. All of it mixed up, the good and the bad, trying to find your way through, never knowing any real answers, just going on hints, hunches and assumptions, while trying to get love and give love, hopefully in equal measure, but never really knowing, but always trying.