Writer's block

Nothing is jumping out at me. Typically, I write these posts inspired from some event or realization that happens throughout the day or week. There is a lot going on in life, good and bad, up and down, just nothing raising to the level of "postable".

Yet, here I sit, not sure exactly why. There isn't a message I want to deliver to the world, to friends and family, there isn't some huge growth step I am processing, or a depression I am trying to work through, life just kind of is.

I am a little tired, it has been a busy couple of weeks and is going to continue this way for the next couple of months, both personally and professionally - incidentally, I am going to go to work tomorrow for probably five or six hours to catch up. In addition to the hecticness of my schdeule, and I never thought I would be the person to say this, but it is damn hot out and the heat is sapping some of my energy.

By the way, my best friend and his family are leaving today for their new home, in a new city, hundreds of miles away, so he can begin a new job, one that seems he will be very happy with. I spoke with him this evening and he seems in good spirits, a bit tired, ready to begin this new stage in life. I am sending him positive thoughts and ask that you might as well.

On a very different and random note, is anyone else scared about the recent middle east crisis? Maybe it is the irrational fear that I carry over from my dad's evangelical, end of world mindset, but what is happening in Israel has a lot of pretty significant implications and portends some craziness in international affairs, especially as it relates to Iran, for the foreseeable future. Some experts I have heard believe Iran is helping stir up this recent trouble and is emboldened in the middle east because the US took out their chief rival, Saddam, and the US itself is sapped of military strength in Iraq. Scary stuff...

Let the randomness of this post continue...

My life, the incidents of my life, the events, the interactions, seem so far from my mind almost immediately after they happen, the exception being when I "debrief" a conversation or event immediately after it takes place, to discuss primarily the personal interactions between myself and the participants and their interactions with others. Typically, Beth and I will talk about our impressions of a conversation or group of people after the event has taken place and discuss what we found interesting, or as is sometimes the case, boring. Thankfully, I have been able to find a social circle in which I find most of the conversations to be the former.

I say all that not to go into what we debrief, although that could be interesting, but to give you a glimpse into why my blog is very perception focused versus incident focused. I have a pretty constant running temperature of my emotional state and what I am perceiving, processing, thinking and feeling. Therefore, when I do sit down to blog, my posts tend to focus more on my current psychological state then what I did over the last week.

One of the reasons I will post without necessarily having something significant to say is because consistency is very important to me. I believe that if something is important to me, like for example this blog, my friends, Beth, studying for the GRE, then I will make sure to nurture that thing and participate in it on a regular basis. For example, I will never leave an email unanswered for more than a couple of days, I am typically the last person to email back in a string of email and I will always return phone calls, although I sometimes will have a two day lag in getting back to someone.

I know this post was scattered and random, maybe I am feeling a little scattered and random, but consistency dictates my posting, mainly because I think my post is a good way of saying hello.

So, here I am, sitting now, in a darkening room, leaned back, mellow soma music streaming, gin and tonic by my side, attempting to stay awake, reaching out via my blog to say hello, and hoping you all know how much I love you, hoping you know how much I care and praying that I am living a life worth living.

Hello everyone, I am writing to say hello.