I am happy and relaxed...

I started singing that to myself several months ago when I was anything but. I found that singing those words worked as kind of an affirmation that would help me get through a frustrating situation.

Over the last couple of weeks though I have been very happy and relaxed and the song will just pop into my brain. Pop! And here I sit, happy and relaxed.

Walking down the street and Pop! The tune fills my mind and I am happy and relaxed. A good day at work, meeting up with friends, a good ride on the bike...Pop! I am happy and relaxed.

It's a nice feeling. I am lucky and blessed to have these moments. It has taken a lot of work, you can see that by perusing my blog. But here I am, happy and relaxed.

Okay, so now, a little shift here, I am going to write about something I am feeling and one of the things that is helping my state of mind to be happy and relaxed, even though it wasn't what I intended this post to be about.

Anyway, I am normally not someone who prefaces what he is going to say but I am doing a lot of that right now. So why the prefacing? Well the subject I am going to write about is a little private and well, mainly, because Beth is going to kill me for what I am going to discuss here...

But hey, its my blog, so here we go! Beth and I have been having really good sex very consistently and we have been very much in love!

There I said it! Now the whole world knows - or at least the whole world that is my blog readership - that my wife and I have sex, good sex even!

But I think it is important to say as something that affects my state of mind. Something that helps us both to be happy and relaxed. For us, sex is a way to connect - physically of course, which is very important to two people who really like touch as a form of love - but also emotionally. Our love making begins and ends with touching and talking, catching up and checking in. It is an expression of our personalities and our love for each other - and, we enjoy it and have fun.

It has become a part of our regular routine in life. We have pretty intense schedules and neither of us like sitting around for too long, so unless there is a nap that follows, when our lovemaking ends we are up and onto the next task that awaits.

Its funny, when I was a teenager fantasizing about sex or even in college, when I was finally having sex, I thought of it as the result or the goal. Do things right in a relationship so you could have sex. Act the right way, say the right things and look at the wonderful reward you receive.

And, ahh, what a great reward it is. Sigh..

Ahem, excuse me, back to my point. What was my point again?

Oh yeah! What I realize now is that sex is part of a relationship, not just the result. For Beth and I, it is a reflection of the emotional state of our marriage - when our relationship is clicking our sex life is clicking. On the same note a healthy sex life contributes to a healthy marriage.

As I sit here, humming, "I am happy and relaxed, I am happy and relaxed" I know that part of my happiness is, lets face it, I am a man, that we are making love on a consistent basis. But on the whole, I am happy and relaxed because I have an amazing partner with who I am blessed to share this life. Someone who loves and supports me for exactly who I am . We are really clicking lately, having a lot of fun. I appreciate our marriage and I appreciate her.

The sex part, well that is like a very delicious icing on a wonderful cake!

PS She is going to kick my butt for this one!